|
42 | 42 | " crew is spaced.", |
43 | 43 | " crew is recycled.", |
44 | 44 | " crew is recovered.", |
45 | | - " yells: 'Thy mother mates poorly!'", |
46 | | - " snarls: 'Lucky shot.'", |
47 | | - " laughs: 'You'll not do THAT again!'", |
| 45 | + " yells: 'thy mother mates poorly!'", |
| 46 | + " snarls: 'lucky shot.'", |
| 47 | + " laughs: 'you'll not do THAT again!'", |
48 | 48 | " says nothing.", |
49 | | - " screams: 'Thy father is a Targ!'", |
50 | | - " yells: 'Your parents eat bats!'", |
51 | | - " snarls: 'Thy people eat vermin!'", |
52 | | - " yells: 'May you create social disease!'", |
53 | | - " curses: 'Thy fathers spreadeth pox!'", |
54 | | - " yells: 'Your mother is progressive!'", |
| 49 | + " screams: 'thy father is a Targ!'", |
| 50 | + " yells: 'thine family eats bats!'", |
| 51 | + " snarls: 'thine people eat vermin!'", |
| 52 | + " curses: 'thy fathers spreadeth pox!'", |
| 53 | + " yells: 'thy mother is progressive!'", |
55 | 54 | ] |
56 | 55 | MISTAKES = [ |
57 | 56 | "... the crew was not impressed ...", |
58 | 57 | "... that's going to leave a mark ...", |
59 | | - "... next time, remember to 'carry the 1'? ...", |
| 58 | + "... next time carry the 1?", |
60 | 59 | "... math lives matter ...", |
61 | | - "... that's coming out of your paycheck ...", |
| 60 | + "... its coming out of your pay ...", |
62 | 61 | "... this is not a bumper car ...", |
63 | | - "... life can be tough, that way ...", |
64 | | - "... who ordered THAT take-out ...", |
| 62 | + "... life can be tough that way ...", |
| 63 | + "... who ordered THAT take-out?", |
65 | 64 | "... random is, what random does ...", |
66 | 65 | "... you've got their attention ...", |
67 | | - "... next time, just text them ...", |
| 66 | + "... next time, just text them?", |
68 | 67 | "... how rude!", |
69 | 68 | "... yes, karma CAN hurt ...", |
70 | 69 | "... life is but a dream!", |
71 | 70 | "... game over.", |
72 | | - "... they will talk about this one for years.", |
73 | | - "... who is going to pay for this?", |
| 71 | + "... starfleet will talk about this for years.", |
| 72 | + "... who is going to pay for that?", |
74 | 73 | "... galactic insurance premiums skyrocket ...", |
75 | 74 | "... captain goes down with the starship ...", |
76 | 75 | "... we'll notify your next-of-kin.", |
77 | 76 | "... that was not in the script ...", |
78 | 77 | "... you never did THAT in the simulator ...", |
79 | 78 | ] |
80 | 79 |
|
| 80 | +QUITS = [ |
| 81 | + "-Let's call it a draw?", |
| 82 | + "-You call yourself a 'Trekkie?", |
| 83 | + "Kobayashi Maru. Python for you?", |
| 84 | + "(Spock shakes his head)", |
| 85 | + "(Duras, stop laughing!)", |
| 86 | + "(... and the Klingons rejoice)", |
| 87 | + "(... and our enemies, rejoice)", |
| 88 | + "Kobayashi Maru... Got Python?", |
| 89 | + "(Kirk shakes his head)", |
| 90 | + ] |
| 91 | + |
81 | 92 | class Quips(): |
82 | 93 |
|
83 | 94 | @staticmethod |
84 | 95 | def jibe(noun, prefix, suffix): |
85 | 96 | prand = random.randrange(0, len(prefix)) |
86 | 97 | srand = random.randrange(0, len(suffix)) |
87 | 98 | return prefix[prand] + noun + suffix[srand] |
| 99 | + |
| 100 | + @staticmethod |
| 101 | + def jibe_quit(): |
| 102 | + return QUITS[random.randrange(0, len(QUITS))] |
88 | 103 |
|
89 | 104 | @staticmethod |
90 | 105 | def jibe_damage(noun): |
|
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